May 2015 - Naijacruz | On Top The Matter

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I believe in love more than I believe in anything else in the world. I
 also believe too many people settle because they don’t ask themselves 
the tough questions they should before they make the “love him or leave him” decision. 
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When you have reached a relationship fork in the road, or perhaps, 
you just want a reality check before making the best (or possibly, 
worst) decision of your life. 
Here are 11 questions you should stop and ask yourself before getting into a relationship with that guy. 
1. Does he bring out the best in you? 
We all possess beauty and believe it or not, we all also possess 
ugly. The person with whom you choose to spend the rest of your life 
should magnify your strengths and balance out your weaknesses. He should
 make you feel like not only the best version of yourself, but the 
truest version, as well. If you had to summarize yourself in just five 
qualities, what would you like them to be? Now, think about the 
qualities that your significant other brings out in you. Do they align? 
How would he describe you? When the qualities you strive to have become 
the qualities you possess, true harmony becomes possible. 
2. Does he make you want to be a better person/friend/sister/employee? 
I have learned that when we feel fulfilled and accepted exactly as we
 are, we tend to become better versions of ourselves. When we feel 
unappreciated and misunderstood, we struggle to exist as we are. True 
happiness fills hearts with so much joy that it overflows into the 
relationships that surround us. Have your relationships outside of the 
one with your current partner flourished or suffered since you have been
 together? The love of your life will want you to nurture relationships 
that are important to you rather than require your full and undivided 
attention. If you find yourself skipping out on girls’ nights, missing 
your nephew’s t-ball games and making excuses for leaving family dinners
 early because you have been made to feel guilty for not spending all of
 your time with your significant other, it might be time to reassess. 
3. Does he make the ordinary seem extraordinary? 
Every person has a different opinion of the ideal date, the perfect 
way to spend a weekend and a fantasy vacation destination, but when it 
comes to day-to-day activities, how do you spend your time? Do you 
explore together, go on adventures together and, most importantly, enjoy
 performing everyday tasks together, such as going to the grocery store 
or folding your laundry? Some might laugh at this question, but the rest
 of your life is a long time to spend with someone you don’t enjoy doing
 the mundane with. It’s amazing how much more fun “chores” can be when 
you are performing them with someone you love. 
4. Does he make you feel safe? 
While it’s nice to feel protected with the comfort of beefy arms, the
 safety to which I am referring involves your feelings and emotions. 
Does he make you feel safe when you need to share something that’s been 
on your mind, reassess a situation that happened at work or when you 
just need someone to listen? Does he make you feel safe to chase your 
dreams and discover your passions? Men and women are very different and 
tend to deal with emotions very differently; however, there is something
 to be said about a man who chooses to listen, tries to understand and 
protect your feelings. 
5. Does he make you laugh? 
This may be one of the most important questions. Life is way too 
short to spend it being serious and there is nothing better than 
laughing until your stomach cramps with someone who demonstrates a 
weirdness similar to your own. We are all weird and goofy and we all 
have the capability to be completely hilarious in the eyes of someone 
who appreciates our specific style of humor. The bottom line is that 
life is better when you’re laughing. What better way to determine if 
you’re with the right person than to ask yourself, “Does he make me 
laugh?” 
6. Do you enjoy talking to him? 
We focus so much on the destination that we often fail to notice all 
of the steps it took to arrive. The top of the mountain may be 
beautiful, but the conversation on the hike up makes the journey 
worthwhile. Choose to spend your days with someone you can talk to about
 anything and still feel as though there’s more left to say. I always 
feel sad when I see a couple at a restaurant staring blankly at each 
other in silence, swirling their straws in their glasses, as though 
there’s truly nothing left to discuss. Life is way too long to fill it 
with small talk. 
7. Does he calm your storms or create your storms? 
The love of your life should be your heart’s resting place. The 
safety in the chaos, rainbow after the rain and the person you know you 
will leave feeling better than when you started. All too often, people 
get stuck in relationships that create more storms in their lives and 
spend the whole relationship trying to calm them. Life is hard enough as
 it is. We shouldn’t have to spend our days in relationships that only 
make it harder. When you’ve had a bad day, to whom do you turn? When you
 cry, who wipes away the tears? The love of your life should spend more 
time bringing sunshine rather than rain to your life. 
8. Do you respect one another? 
Respect is one of the most important qualities to have in a 
relationship. If you respect someone, you will likely not embarrass him 
in front of others. If you respect someone, you will choose to come 
directly to him when you have a problem, rather than talking about it to
 everyone else first. Arguments follow a much more constructive highway 
when respect is present. 
9. Do you fight the same way? 
Everyone has a preferred method for fighting and it’s imperative that
 you and your significant other are compatible in conflict resolution. 
It will not always be rainbows and butterflies and problems will arise. 
If two people prefer to “fight” in completely opposite ways, it may not 
work in the long run. Some people need to get heated, scream it out and 
say things they’ll regret later on in order to feel understood. Some 
people shut down completely and need time to cool off and think about 
things, while others need to discuss the situation immediately and feel 
hurt when their partner says he needs some time or space. Some people 
need to sit down and have lengthy discussions about every tiny detail of
 a situation before they feel better, while other people would rather 
just forgive and forget and move forward. It’s important to ask yourself
 how you handle conflicts with the people you love. 
10. Does he challenge you? 
All too often, people become complacent in relationships. Does your 
relationship challenge you mentally, physically and intellectually? Do 
you feel as though you learn from each other, grow with one another and 
have progressed both individually and together since you have been 
together? The love of your life will fuel your passions so that you can 
pursue the things you find meaningful and will challenge you to learn 
new skills that the two of you can pursue together. 
11. Is he good on paper or is he good in person? 
Do you love HIM or the IDEA of him? It’s so easy to create an image 
of the perfect man, only to realize that the person in our minds doesn’t
 exist. Be patient with your heart and be aware of your feelings. If you
 are forcing it, justifying it or constantly seeking approval for it, it
 might not be the right relationship for you. Don’t waste time trying to
 make sense of your love, but rather, wait for the love that simply 
makes sense. </div>
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[Must Read] 11 Honest Questions Ladies Should Ask Their self About Their Man

I believe in love more than I believe in anything else in the world. I also believe too many people settle because they don’t ask the...

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Una weldone here ooooooo.. I miss ya’ll <img alt="cheesy" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png" /> 
No prologue this time cos no time to waste time <img alt="cheesy" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png" /> 
Let’s get to business 
 
10 Disgusting Things Guys Do When A Lady Says NO SEX 
1. Drives Her Out Of His Room 
Vividly do I recollect the case of a guy living very close to my villa 
who accommodated a young lady during her Post UME exam. In the middle of
 the night, he made advances and the lady in question denied him of 
entrance. He flared up and drove her out of his room leaving her 
sleeping on a corridor till dawn *Even Orijin101 is not exempted from 
this act * <img alt="tongue" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png" /> 
2. He Refuses To Give Her T-Fare 
He labels her as a GOLD DIGGER if she dare ask for T-fare after which she had denied him of entrance. 
3. He Resorts To Beating Her 
Even some married men are not exempted from this shameful act (so as 
some young dudes). I have however seen the case of a man who resort to 
beating his wife because she refused. Neighbours gathered in front of 
his door begging him to please open the door. When the FOOL eventual 
opened the door, he couldn’t even say what his wife did that warrant 
beating (but we know what’s up <img alt="cheesy" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png" />) 
4. He Becomes Overly Stingy 
It’s no news that many guys exhibit ” my money does not go for free 
attitude”. The notion that nothing goes for nothing has turned many into
 becoming overly stingy the moment their advances was turned down. Even 
Ronald4lif is not exempted from this act <img alt="cheesy" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png" /> 
5. His Love For Her Head On Diminishing Returns 
In the world of today, sex now seems to be the talk of the day. Many 
want to get laid so as to be on top of the game and brag to their 
friends about it. When no hope of bleeping is coming forth after several
 attempts, they lose interest and their love or chase head on 
diminishing returns 
6. He Lies About Stomach Disorder 
I don’t know if this is medically proven but I have occasionally 
overheard many guys complained about stomach disorder when they are 
unable to discharge their fluid. Many will act like they want to die 
just to make the lady have compassion on them and let them have their 
way <img alt="cheesy" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png" /> 
7. He Acts Aggressively 
Those who only see ladies as sex gadget would act violently and 
aggressively like soldier going for World war III. They become so rude 
and disrespectful towards ladies just because they want to get under her
 skirt without commitment and dump her in a wink 
8. He Rapes Her 
This is a common occurrence in the world of today. Many will resort To Molest 
9. He Turns Back And Acts Like You Do Not Exist 
He turns his back to her and acts like she doesn’t even exist. In some 
cases, he wears his shirt and quickly pretend having an appointment with
 someone just to send her away 
 
10. Guys free to add yourz <img alt="cool" border="0" class="faces" src="http://www.nairaland.com/faces/cool.png" />

10 Disgusting Things Guys Do When A Lady Says NO SEX

Una weldone here ooooooo.. I miss ya’ll No prologue this time cos no time to waste time Let’s get to business 10 Disgusting Things Guy...